Everything's messy. I admit it. Not only am I juggling a whole new level of schoolwork as I've entered my preliminaries, but I've also had to find the balance between both work and play. Here's a little recap of what's happened this week:
Thankfully was able to resolve some personal issues
Successfully followed (most) of the schedule for the Twitch streams
Moved into my Year 11 preliminary work for school
It's been a little busy lately, but I've been trying to keep myself sane. I'm still following most of the things from my previous post, "how i'm doing" and I've been trying to keep myself well and productive (although, my hours of sleep have reverted back to normal, which is unfortunately 7hr30m-7hr45m of sleep).
For most of my life, it's been quite messy. Friendships, relationships, school -- it's all really messy. However, I've decided to "embrace the chaos" in terms of how messy my life can be. I've also applied this philosophy in terms of notetaking, taking heavy inspiration from @ "How I use Obsidian" post. (It's really helpful, since you don't have to worry about this constant "organisation" and can just... write.)
It embraces chaos and laziness to create emergent structure.
I've actually been using it this philosophy in one of my Obsidian vaults called "playground". Unfortunately, I haven't been able to apply this philosophy to other vaults such as my academics vault. I've also slightly tweaked it in order to suit my needs, and to isolate my thoughts from polished drafts.
It actually reminds me of something I learned recently in my English Advanced course. In the aforementioned course, it is expected that students are to:
Develop their own writing style
Take risks and experiment with different formulae (such as textual forms and types)
Learn to reflect on their own writing to efficiently refine and edit
I think life has been trying to make me understand that it's okay to be messy. It's okay to experiment. It's okay to not have your life together. It's okay not to have the best career, not have the best drafts, and not have the best of anything. It's sort of mind-boggling because I've been a "perfectionist" for a large chunk of my life. And after all of the years of constant structure and instructions, I'm given the choice to be messy? I'm given the choice to freedom?
It also relates to my experience in Society and Culture. It's one of the most experimental classes I've felt like I've been in. I guess it's right up my alley, since we're taught to question the "familiar" and analyse the patterns of society. I was honestly just mindblown by the sociological study of "Nacirema" (we did read an abridged version) and my mouth was just open the whole time after realising what it really was. I recommend having a read, at least with a few paragraphs. It helps you imagine what an objective, detached sociological analysis would look like.
All in all, without all the yapping, my life has been messy. And that's okay. I'll embrace it for what it is.
Sincerely,
Davo