For the fullest context, I recommend reading the following posts.

For the fullest reading experience, I recommend having the following songs in the background.

You gave me a reason.

A reason for me to be a person I never want to see.

You've done nothing wrong and in fact, you've done everything right.

You were nice, you were kind, you were more than enough in my eyes.

I wrote poems, wrote songs, even handwritten letters.

I stayed on calls, listening to your velvety voice. I admired your soft, ruffled hair. I sat beside you, trying to see what was behind those eyes.

I lost sleep for you. I held myself intact just for you. I kept being friends because I wanted to keep us close.

And for what?

For when I tried to move forward, you pulled me backwards. With words, exchanged in poetry, enlaced in fear.

And yeah, maybe it's my fault. Maybe it's my fault that I loved you too much, that I still gave you something when we were clearly apart. When I shared the last pieces of me.

Maybe it's my fault that I stayed, knowing that it would never work. You share your gaze with amity, while I stay here and look at you with affection.

My heart aches, it bleeds, it seethes. It resents with pain, the hole now gaping open.

The moon turns crimson, the world is painted red.

My frustration, my annoyance, my anger, it seethes from a place I never thought would exist. The deepest parts of me, the ones I try to control, they seek answers for questions never answered.

So why, I ask, do you continue to want me by your side? You don't love me. No, you never did. You never did.

Why can't you say the words that fall on the tip of your tongue? Why do I linger on and wait for those words to roll into the raging currents of the water?

Why do I seek your warmth? Why do I always fall into you? When you never, ever fell into me.

So while my heart continues to bleed and while you continue to long for friendship, you give me a reason I was so desperate to find.

A reason to never return.

Until you find the courage to let your heart scream with its truest voice, until the walls have fallen, and until honesty echoes the chambers of our present...

We will never see each other in the same light again.

Signing off,

Davo