a bittersweet masquerade

Originally Published: November 2, 2025

They say that the stories of old floating in the midst of the breeze seem to be the most entertaining and fascinating of stories.

The tales that travel as you pass by, from lullabies to strange folktale.

And I shall tell you a tale that is writing its own ending.

If there is even an ending at all.

PROLOGUE

A Battle With Fate / Fortitude of Fallen Stars

It all started with a battle with fate. A gambit to seek the answers to the world. My belief, my identity, my soul. It wreaked havoc on my mind, tore my soul into half, and questioned my sense of belonging to my own self. Doubts filled my futile and human mind. “Did I truly belong in this world?”

Through all of that, I found myself alive. No longer was I buried in my mind, but I was seeing the world shift and turn around me. Desolate and afraid, I sought warmth from places beyond my reach. Thinking the stars could make me feel alive, feel free, and feel like I had a lifeline. What a futile end that was.

Then, all of a sudden, an invitation to a dance. Its warmth, its energy, its excitement. It filled my mind. “Could this finally be the end to my miserable life?”

I thought that this was the start of a new journey. The end of my old past. All of my fortitude to be paid into wealth and riches. And so it was, but not to my expectations.

CHAPTER 1

Snowflakes Falling Gently, In The Midst of A Masquerade

I played a role, an actor in a play. My role to seek the love I so wished for, the dreams I sought for, and the worries I wished to erase. It felt like an uneasy paradise, superficial and fake. Undeniably inauthentic. Attempting to find the silver lining, but only failing and failing and failing.

I was rash, playing into the hands of my own demise. Stubborn with my own will. Ignoring the rationale from around me. Hoping for something, like a desert dweller falling for a mirage. Creating a shadow, a reflection in my mind. “Is this truly what you wished for, dear prince?”

But still, I continued the dance, a tango for two. The mirage and the prince. Once again, my imagination played with the strings of my greatest desires, twisting it into a false reality. But I continued, as I waited for the veil upon me to fall.

So consumed by the thought of my demise, I demanded its existence to be true. Not knowing my actions, self-destruction was an imminent result.

And so I waited for fate to play its role, continuing this dance I so thoroughly followed. Futility continued circling my fragile mind, begging for numbness and to farewell these events. Secrets bubbling upon the surface, yet still remaining in its chambers.

But even with this mirage fooling my vision and latching onto my desires, I found the light it was trying its hardest to hide. The silver lining I wished for, but only in its purest form. It was not the same as my dreams, but there was something more free about it. Like the fallen stars I had seen, yet to reach its supernova. It was a star, similar to the past, but reminiscent of a new future.

The mirage continued to play its tricks, as I fell into its despair and insanity. It was as if I played a masquerade, hiding the cards in my hand as I continued to find a way to reach the star. And thus, it came to a close. However, it was not an easy decision to make.

I broke the shackles that bound me to this play, discarded the mask I held onto the floor, and destroyed the mirage like a prop on the stage. Consequentially, the star had shattered as the mirage that so clouded it, became part of it. So desperate to find an end to this dance I so wished to leave, fate gave me a gift with knives. A drop, shedding from my hazy eyes, not knowing if it was tears of freedom or the blood of my bleeding soul.

Then, it was silent. The lights were off. I found the exit, with blood staining my hands. For all the dreams I so wished for, it became the end of the story. Naivety, stubbornness, and foolishness, all merged into one.

It was quiet but windy in the forest of wonders and reality. But as I walked each step, I felt a phantom following my every step. Guilt holding onto my shoulder, like a heavy burden. It whispered, “How could you be so foolish to fall for a mirage and destroyed your only hope? How could you destroy the dream you so wished for and the reality that wished for you?”

But I kept walking, forgetting the past. Burning the invitation, I sought to destroy the memories within. I was no longer part of that play, I was no longer part of that masquerade, I was no longer the desperation I embodied in that role. I was my own person, not holding onto attachment or connection.

It was a bittersweet walk in this forest of wonders. I felt free, yet guilty. Was this truly freedom, or a means to an end?

But then, fate gave its final verdict.

It was not the end of this story, for there were the remains of a dying star. Wishing to be saved.

And so I did. I would not let it fall again.

CHAPTER 2

Fragile Waters To Heal A Dying Star

With the remnants of a dying star, I ensured its needed revival. To allow it to survive, to allow it to thrive. A newfound bond, formed by the past and kindled by a bright present.

I no longer had to play a masquerade, a false pretence in order to ensure my survival. It was freedom, without guilt watching over my shoulder. It was as if the phantom that continued to linger had disappeared without a trace.

But this dying star continued to have remnants of the fallen mirage, dreams and reality unfortunately inseparable. It did not stop me from walking this new path, as I continued to wander through the forest of wonders. I would not let the nightmares of the past darken the light of the present.

Fragile waters surrounded the forest, as if life had began to bloom once again. It was no longer the haunting frost of the harsh winter, but now the spring of newborn life.

I no longer needed dreams filled with futility and naivety. I was happy with the reality of the new star I had now found myself with.

But at times where the dreams of the past returned once again, it was a matter of hiding to ensure this newfound bond’s survival. Destroying my expectations, I played into the hands of fate again, unknowingly creating my own masquerade.

But things were different this time. Despair and guilt anticipated for my reborn demise, like an adversary taunting me. I decided to wait.

I decided to let fate tell the rest of this story, only to be measured by time that followed. I was comfortable in this new position, a tale mixed with the known and unknown.

There was no longer any reason to fear the future.

INTERLUDE

A Pause, For Now

Though remnants of the past remain, I shall no longer let it cloud my judgement and let my identity lose itself again.

Although I still wish for a brighter future, I cannot waste the even brighter present in front of me. I will let fate decide what is next in this story of mine.

It is still writing its ending, so let us sit here in patience.

For now, I will let the other stories in parallel to thrive, to seek a better future.

Let the ending present itself with gentleness and peace.

To be continued …

Sincerely, Davo